Dream, pray and live.

During my teenage years, when I still have the luxury of time that has afforded me to stare into blank spaces, I do daydream a lot. I cannot recall now the details of those magical moments when my mind wandered while the earth around me stood still , but the theme always evolved around me, indulging in a fantasy of abundance, treating myself, my parents, my sister and my brother some of life’s comforts that were way beyond our reach. Still vivid in my memory are the scribbles at the back of my notebook when I was a freshman in college. I’ve drawn my aspirations when I reach the age of 30 – a car and a house with 5 stick people inside it, representing the family that I wanted to build. At that early age, I am certain that I wanted to have a family of my own, to be a wife and a mum. My only prayer then is for God to grant me a husband who will be a great father to my kids, just like how my dad is to me and my siblings.

After 16 years of being married and being busy with the daily challenges of being a mum and a wife and many other ‘me’ in between, the chance to daydream just became more and more elusive. But when I come to think of it, why would I need the time to daydream when I have all the time in the world to live the dream – to wear my favourite hat of all, day in and day out – being a mum to Keith and Seth. Motherhood isn’t the easiest, but it is the most rewarding. It is unglamorous at most times, like this shot – no make-up on, no fancy dresses, no filters nor fabulous background, but instead wearing those extra pounds from pregnancy and a smile on my face that constantly reminds me of the overwhelming happiness and pure contentment in my heart, just from holding the precious gems in my hands. Simple. Priceless. Picture-perfect. My dream life. And I will forever be grateful!

Today, I want to say THANK YOU to someone who makes my job as a mum a bit easier, fun and overwhelmingly fulfilling. To the father of my kids, the answer to my prayers, my best friend, THANK YOU! I might have verbalised my gratitude to this man on several occasions, but today, I want to acknowledge his mere presence in our lives during those times when being a mum becomes challenging, frustrating and just utterly overwhelming. I want to say THANK YOU…

… FOR STAYING AWAKE ON THOSE WEE HOURS, trying to calm our colic first-born.

Being new parents, we both don’t know what to do and we just depended hugely from babycenter.com and some baby books, but just when I was about to cry myself too out of frustration, Orly carried Keith, laid him with his tummy against his chest and somehow he managed to calm down our cranky little boy. The moment Keith stopped crying was pure heaven!

… FOR FINDING THE NURSE who successfully inserted the IV needle into Keith’s vein.

That nurse just finished his duty for the day, but out of desperation to ease our 6-month old son’s pain, Orly went that extra mile to locate him. The other nurses on duty tried but they all failed and our baby’s arms and feet were already bruised! I can’t stand to watch our helpless baby, but this particular nurse just knew the trick.  He has been our angel in disguise!

… FOR INTRODUCING OUR BOYS TO SPORTS.

‘I don’t want Karate anymore!’ or ‘I want to try another sports!’ Hearing those lines after trying one sport after another was really frustrating. I wanted to just give up then.  I viewed this whole sport-hunting exercise as a waste of time, money and effort, but their dad didn’t give up on them until they found the sports that they embraced, or until soccer found them. They found their one true love! I will never get tired hearing his words of encouragement and watching him play with them. Sports played a big part in moulding Orly’s being, and it radiates from the traits that made me fell in love with this man. He knows that sports help build character and I couldn’t agree more. The confidence that our sons have built with their physical and mental capabilities has gone a long way. They also understand better now that it is not always about winning, but being able to pick themselves up when they fall.

… FOR HUGGING SETH TIGHT when he got really scared

He was shaking because of a prank video that he saw on the computer. Seeing Seth trembling that day shocked me! But it is good to see that he is slowly outgrowing and facing his fears now.

… FOR CALMING ME DOWN when Keith gone missing.

I picked him up from the train station that day, and I started to panic when I wasn’t able to find him from the crowd. All passengers had left the station, and there was no sight of Keith! My heart started to beat faster and faster! That was one of his first few attempts of commuting on his own from school. I was calling his mobile again and again, but he wasn’t picking up! I called Orly, I was already frantic, but he stayed calm and assured me that all will be fine. He managed to reach Keith on his phone. Poor Keith fell asleep and just came to his senses when a station staff woke him up at the last station of that train line – 5 stations past from where he was supposed to get off. Still startled and a bit scared, he listened to his dad’s instructions and managed to find his way back to me. I was reunited with my precious boy, and I can’t be happier!

… FOR PERFECTING THE ART OF cleaning dishes, washing clothes, mopping floor, replacing lightbulbs, vacuuming carpets, lawn mowing, assembling furniture, grilling, preparing our favourite desserts and the list goes on. Our life here is very much different from how it was back home, where we had the luxury of household help. Orly had stepped up and showed our boys how to be resilient. This week, our boys learned how to iron their school uniforms. I am sure they’ll embrace this new life skill in no time.

… FOR IMBIBING IN THEM THE LOVE OF MUSIC.

Music works wonders, and I am just glad they got their singing voice from your genes!

… FOR MAKING ME EMBRACE IMPERFECTIONS, UNSTRUCTURED DAYS AND A SPONTANEOUS LIFE.

I grew up with a very structured agenda, where there is great fear of failures and mistakes. I always set high expectations from myself, which translated to a huge pressure to deliver. I don’t intend to pass that on to our kids, and I am grateful for Orly’s constant reminder that there are other ways to define success and find happiness. I have learned to love the flaws within us and to instead exert an effort in finding what is special. Amidst all the effort though, the excessive use of gadgets still makes me crazy! I am just glad that I got Orly’s support with the new gadgets / tv policy at home today. Wish us luck!

What we have is an imperfect, ordinary and fleeting life. Sharing it with an ordinary man who happens to be doing an extra-ordinarily good job in raising our kids makes me enjoy motherhood the way I imagined it to be. THANK YOU ORLY for making me believe that dreams do come true.